Q&A: We all know that happiness is a choice, so why don’t they teach our kids in school how to be happier people?
Question by StephanieM: We all know that happiness is a choice, so why don’t they teach our kids in school how to be happier people?
Happiness, just like any other emotion is 100% controllable, you can choose to be happy in any occasion, and when people do that, their life become much better; they look at things from a different prospective, and they really get to live longer, be healthier and have more productive lives, whatever careers they choose; so why not teach our kids about the psychology of emotion, its a bit complicated, but not as complicated as 4th grade math… why are more people choose to be unhappy? work in a job they hate, date with someone they hate, make stupid choices that makes no sense to me; they choose to be unhappy, all these guys who say “oh, i hate my life”; they can be happy by choice, by simply focusing on more positive things, so i say – teach our kids in school about controlling happiness and our kids will be smarter, crime will decrease and our quality of life in the US will be much better…
Best answer:
Answer by James Hassle
It would be nice if we could but that should be the parents job. Granted many parents aren’t up to the job or don’t know this themselves but I really would not have wanted some of my old teachers responsible for teaching me something they did not know either. I agree it is an important lesson but I’m not sure that school is the place to learn it. Congratulations on being way ahead of the curb. Most people don’t learn this until much latter in life if at all. It’s always been all about or choices and right to choose. Choose well!
What do you think? Answer below!
what if some people don’t want to be happy in these drudgy zombie like state which you are refering to?
I know this might seem hard to understand for a happy-go-lucky girl like you, but a skeptical and pessimistic view on life has its advantages as well, and frankly I would rather be a tad pessimistic and unhappy, then to jump around in euphoria all day like a mindless idiot.
There are many social expectations of kids and adolescents. There are also bad experiences for kids who don’t fit in the social norm. You know those who don’t fall into the social clicks. Learning about happiness does not come from school teachers but from the home. If the parents don’t show true acceptance of their kids then they will not be a happy person. They don’t know true happiness as an adult because of their family background.
Your opinion, and rest assured it is simply just that, is highly erroneous and inconsistent with the way human beings work.
One cannot simply decide to be a happy person, and just because you are, does not mean that everyone else chooses not to be. No emotion is 100% controllable, anyone who tells you this is most likely a bullsh*t self-help guru.
Now, I’m not saying that this (looking at the positives and such) can’t work for some people, but usually that’s no where near good enough. There are SO many factors which could be bringing a person down (ALL of which may be valid) that you can never just generalize and put everyone in the same box. A person with a bad job may not have the time, resources, or may have significant others depending on him/her to bring in a steady paycheck. A person who stuck in a bad relationship may have a number of reasons to stick around. Perhaps they don’t think they can do any better (not saying this is the case, but that’s how they may feel), or maybe the relationship is an abusive one. Abusive relationships are extremely complicated and no matter how strongly you feel about it, unless you’re a part of one, you can’t possibly understand what it feels like. A person who (you believe) is making stupid choices may also have a number of reasons why they do so. If we’re talking about school aged children, then maybe hormones are running amok in this person’s head. Or maybe there’s a difficult home environment (or school environment) which the person is coping with by acting out. How could YOU possibly know? Unless you’ve decided to pigeonhole everyone.
And then there’s the overarching societal reasons why a person may be feeling unhappy. For instance, did you know that people are not designed to live in such close proximity to each other? Cities, towns, tribes, and so on all progressed from the original group setting: hunter-gatherers. If you look at some of the still existing hunter-gatherer societies you’ll notice that there some places with enough space to section off about a square mile per person. A LOT of the issues that people face in contemporary society (like depression) are thought to be the result of congestion-related stress.
Now, whether or not that’s entirely true, we can’t tell for sure because conducting experiments of that nature are unethical without consent, and not many people are going to want to give consent to have their societal framework utterly altered. But much naturalistic observation has been done on people living in hunter-gatherer settings and as long as they remain that way without tampering from outside sources (organized societies like ours) they are usually completely devoid of many problems that plague ordinary societies (like depression, rape, pedophilia, sex/race inequalities).
So, I guess, in answer to your question-there is no definitive way to be happy. You can generally educate people though, educate them so that they don’t subscribe to ignorant notions. Educate them about human psychology, make an intro to sociology class a school requirement. At least then, kids will understand why they feel the way they do. But the notion that one can teach happiness is inherently ridiculous.
I think it’s the parents job to teach children life skills. That’s my opinion. I agree with you though, if people focus on the positives, they’ll live a longer more fulfilling life.
Happiness is most certainly NOT a choice. It is an emotion. People who believe they can choose which emotions they feel are either delusional, or (if they’re right) disturbed in some other manner. So the question is flawed based on a flawed premise.